How to be a good ally

I’ve seen a lot of articles about good allyship that all mention roughly the same things: following the leadership of marginalized folks, listening to marginalized folks, doing your own research, and calling out injustice when you see it. (If you do want a refresher in some allyship basics, you can check out this short but great article on how to be a good ally.) Those are all absolutely integral parts of being a good ally, but I’ve noticed that there are crucial allyship skills that pretty much all good allies do, but nobody ever talks about. So I’m going to talk about those here.

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One simple trick to make conflict suck less

With any relationship that engenders enough vulnerability and closeness, conflict is usually bound to come up. So one of the best approaches, I’ve found, is to be prepared for it and have a plan for how to handle it when conflict arises.

There’s already tons of literature about how to fight well, but I’ve found one trick that you might not be familiar with.

I call it the “emotional right-of-way.”

Ashley KirsnerMay 13, 2021metaconversation, metaconversations, emotional management, emotion management, conflict, how to make conflict suck less, how make conflict feel less bad, how to fix conflict, one way to make conflict suck less, emotional right-of-way, right-of-way, blog, skip the small talk, Skip the Small Talk, Skip the Small Talk blog, Skip the Small Talk blogpost, feelings, emotions, who should talk first, who should go first, fight, fighting, fight better, better fights, four horsement, four horsemen, four horsemen of the apocalypse, 4 horsemen, 4 horsemen of the apocalypse, how to make up, conflict with boyfriend, conflict with girlfriend, conflict with family, close relationships, close relationship, conflict resolution, resolve conflict Comments

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