How to reduce workplace loneliness
You might have already heard the stats.
Loneliness in general is rampant; studies conducted before the pandemic suggest that three out of five Americans are lonely, and a dearth of meaningful workplace relationships are a huge contributor to that. I’d imagine that given the spike of social isolation during the pandemic, those numbers are even worse now.
What sociologists are referring to as the “loneliness epidemic” is a huge problem not just because of its impact on psychological well-being, but also because of its shockingly detrimental physiological health effects: it’s now well-established that loneliness is just as deadly as smoking a whopping fifteen cigarettes a day. It contributes to cancer risk, heart problems, neurodegenerative diseases, and a host of other long-term and often fatal health problems. In fact, lonely people are 50% more likely to die prematurely than their socially connected counterparts.
And in terms of the impact of loneliness on the workplace specifically, according to recent research, only 20% of employees “strongly agree” that they have a best friend at work. But if that percentage could budge to just 60%, companies would yield 12% higher profit, end up with 36% fewer safety incidents, and gain 7% more engaged customers.
Given all the current workplace efforts to reduce obesity, you’d expect similar efforts to reduce loneliness, since loneliness is actually deadlier than obesity and since loneliness is so deleterious to workplace productivity. But while psychology researchers have been aware of the loneliness epidemic for years, workplaces are just starting to catch on to the immense value of fostering social connection at work.
So, if you’re in a position to influence the culture of your workplace, what can you do to create a culture of social connection at work?
Here are some tips that you might not have heard of before, all informed by psychology research:
Encourage connection outside of work. This might be counterintuitive, but it works.
Research shows that lonely people are more sensitive to negative social stimuli than non-lonely people. That makes it much harder for lonely people to build new social connections than non-lonely people; if strong negative feelings come up any time you think you’re being rejected and you’re likelier to perceive rejection than others (both of which are generally true of lonely people), putting yourself out there is likely to be pretty painful, so you’re less likely to do it.
On the other hand, if you’re feeling pretty socially connected in you outside-of-work life, you’re much likelier to take the social risks necessary to build and foster new connections at work.
So, if you can do whatever is in your power to make sure that employees have meaningful social connections outside of work, that makes it much easier for employees to build connections with each other.
One key way to accomplish this is to set and maintain strong time boundaries between work and not-work.
Don’t send e-mails outside of work hours. Don’t expect work outside of work hours. It may be difficult to resist when you feel like you need to put out fires, but it can have a monumental impact on employees’ ability to forge social connections at work, as well as longer-term productivity, creativity, and employee retention.
If those work boundaries feel difficult to maintain in your industry, you may want to consider trying it out for some predetermined period of time as an experiment, and you may want to consider whatever boundaries feel attainable. You might be surprised at how wide-reaching the impact of those boundaries can be.DON’T skip the small talk, even if it feels awkward. I’ve surveyed Skip the Small Talk guests, and one of the most common pieces of feedback I hear about their work experience is that over the pandemic, the thing they’ve missed the most is “water cooler talk.” They crave the fortuitous conversations that used to happen when they were in the same place as their coworkers at the same time.
It might feel unnatural at first, but Skip the Small Talk guests report that they are happier and feel more connected to their coworkers when their employers make an effort to make chit-chat at the beginning of meetings. In related and probably unsurprising news, many guests spontaneously reported that they particularly appreciate pet cameos on Zoom meetings.
So, build in a few extra minutes to your meetings so you can spend the first few minutes just chatting. If you have a pet or small child who’s willing to make an appearance, that can be a fun way to break the ice. If not, just asking a few people how they’re hanging in there, or even having everybody talk about one new thing they did or experienced that week can make a huge difference.
One recommendation here: even if it’s brief, take a moment to respond to anything an employee says over a Zoom call. A quick follow-up question (this is best reserved for folks who you’re pretty confident will be brief in their answers), or even just a, “That’s awesome,” can make people feel so much more heard and understood. It can otherwise feel vulnerable and awkward to talk in a Zoom meeting if nobody is taking the extra few seconds to respond to everyone. Don’t leave people hanging.Create structured connection that doesn’t feel cheesy. Team-building can be incredibly powerful because you can help people feel much closer to each other in a short period of time, and those feelings of connection last long after the event. But the problem with so many team-building exercises is that employees feel forced into doing them, and there’s not a lot of autonomy involved, so employees mentally “check out” of the event and don’t get to reap the benefits of it.
So, make sure that your team-building events involve a healthy balance of the structure needed to make sure people actually have meaningful interactions (there’s research showing that if given no structure, people often resort to conversations that aren’t particularly connecting even though their preference is for more meaningful chats), and enough autonomy that people feel invested in the event.
For example, our private Skip the Small Talk events for corporate settings and colleges (which have gone entirely online during the pandemic) involve facilitators inviting guests to make accommodations that work best for them. But we also provide a good deal of guidance to ensure that guests are having high-quality interactions that they might not get to otherwise. Our guests who are especially enthusiastic about our events often report that fine balance between autonomy and guidance as one of the reasons they prefer us over other team-building events they’ve experienced.
So if you’re going the route of team-building events, make sure you’re choosing something with enough structure to make sure that people are having the kinds of interactions that create meaningful relationships, but with enough autonomy that guests don’t think the event is “cheesy.”
Investing in social connection at work might be a newer practice, but it’s a smart and relatively easy way to increase productivity and employee retention while having a wider-reaching impact on the health and well-being of your coworkers.
In light of the impact of the pandemic on workplace loneliness, for a limited time, we are offering $50 for all successful corporate and college online event referrals: Introduce us to whoever is in charge of events at your school or company, and if they end up booking an event with us, we’ll send you $50! See here for more information, and feel free to reach out to Ashley at ashley@skipthesmalltalk.org