How to Make LGBTQIA+ Friends
Being friends, but make it gay! Whether you’ve been out for years or are just starting your queer journey, there are few things more affirming than surrounding yourself with a close circle of LGBTQ+ friends. If you’re looking for more queer friends, you’re not alone! Read on for six ways to make LGBTQ+ friends.
Community Events
Queer crafting groups. Trivia. Dance parties. Lectures. Drag shows. Comedy. Writing workshops. Film screenings. Clothing swaps. Meet-ups. Name an activity and there’s a good chance that someone out there is organizing an LGBTQ+ group to do it. If you’re looking for chill, public community events, Eventbrite is a great place to start, as are local LGBTQ+ Facebook groups. It’s a feed two birds with one stone kinda situation (you’re welcome, PETA): You get to do something you enjoy and make queer friends while you do it. What’s not to love?
Intramural Sports
If you’re a Sports Gay™, boy, do I have some news for you… queer people LOVE intramural sports. You ever seen an LGBTQ+ softball league? A kickball team? A pick-up women’s basketball game? (If you’re not watching the WNBA this summer, now is the time to start!) If you’re not a sports person, that’s okay! There are plenty of other ways to make queer friends. But if sweating it out on the soccer field in 90 degree heat is your ideal Saturday morning, joining an LGBTQ+ sports team is a great way to make friends as an adult. Hop online, do some research, and get on out there, sport!
Third Spaces
For both the social butterflies out there and those of us who need a little push, a great way to make queer friends is to find spaces that attract a queer crowd and set up shop. An obvious answer here is gay bars — though depending where you are they can be few and far between. (If you do live near one, see if they host community events!) Some non-bar spaces you might haunt include coffee shops, independent bookstores and libraries, arts markets, or other places where LGBTQ+ people informally collect. Dust off your extrovert jacket and strike up a conversation with your rainbow flag laptop stickered cafe table neighbor. You just might make a friend.
Activism
If you’ve been keeping up with the news, you know that in spite of the progress we’ve made, the 2020s have been a challenging time for the LGBTQ+ community. Whether organizing is already an important part of your life, or if you’re just looking to get started, there are so, so many activist groups engaged in the ongoing fight for queer rights in the U.S.A. and abroad. There are countless community groups engaged in political organizing, direct mutual aid, and grassroots education to get involved with, both online and in person, and many groups are actively looking for new, queer comrades to join the fray.
Affinity Groups
The LGBTQ+ community is large and diverse, with as many intersectional queer identities as there are people who are queer. If you’re looking to bond with people whose experience of queerness aligns more closely with your own, you might consider seeking out affinity groups. Increasingly, community groups and spaces are being established — formally and informally — for LGBTQ+ people who are also BIPOC, trans, disabled, religious, or otherwise share identities that fundamentally shape how they move through the world. Depending on where you live, it might be difficult to find in-person queer affinity spaces, but thankfully there are online options, too. We all deserve queer spaces that allow us to be comfortably and unapologetically ourselves, and that help connect us with people who feel the same.
LGBTQIA+ Speed-Friending
You already knew!! Skip the Small Talk hosts really great events specifically designed to help LGBTQ+ people connect in-person. Scan our events page to see if a queer, STST speed-friending event is coming to a city near you :)