Skip the Small Talk

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5 Ways To Use Social Media To Actually Feel Less Lonely

Loneliness is a growing epidemic in our world, and social media is notorious for playing a large role in perpetuating that growth. There is a growing body of literature on the impact of social media on self-esteem, mental health challenges, and especially loneliness. A study by JAMA psychiatry found that a 10% increase of negative social media experience correlates to a 13% rise in feelings of loneliness. The key word here, however, is “negative” - not all social media experiences have to be negative and in fact, social media iif used strategically, can be an actual connector. It can help us connect to our local communities, find others who share experiences or identities with us, learn about events and different ways to meet others near us, and more. Let’s explore how we may be able to shift our social media use from passive scrolling to optimize the tangible and meaningful connections it can help us make!

  1. Find community surrounding a shared interest, experience, or identity

It’s easy and natural to feel isolated in an experience: whether it’s a racial or cultural identity you hold; a chronic illness or health struggle; a mental health diagnosis; queerness; or a love for a sport or art form, if you don’t have others in your life with whom you can connect about that experience, it can feel really lonely. Social media is actually a great way to find platforms on which others with shared experiences can connect, share tips and information, and establish community with each other. This is particularly helpful for those who may live in a more rural area, or who are just further from others with this shared experience and may not actually have the opportunity to have a related in-person community. A quick search in the app or site usually does the trick!


2. Find IRL experiences or events to connect with community and meet new people

Trust me: there are SO many more events happening in your area than you think. It can just be tricky to find out about them and mark them in your calendar! Social media is one of the best ways that information about events is being circulated. Think about some of the community centers, bars, restaurants, cafes, parks, venues, etc. in your town or neighborhood - give them a follow on social media. Most likely, they will be posting the different events they’re hosting on those pages. Events like comedy shows, workshops, book clubs, etc. are often free and are an incredible way to make new connections. Showing up alone is pretty common as well, and the structure around some sort of event is a perfect buffer to make those first conversations a little less awkward!

There are also organizations who host social events or events more geared towards creating community and connections (ahem, like Skip the Small Talk!). Those organizations will most definitely have social media on which they’ll announce when their upcoming events are. Giving those types of orgs a follow is a great way to make sure you’re staying up to date on all of your opportunities to meet new people!


3. Engage with community organizers and activism in your community 

Whether you’re interested in getting involved in activism around climate change, reproductive rights, racial justice, housing justice, etc…there are a ton of community organizers and organizations out there. Again, it can be hard to find them or find political actions to get involved in! But many organizers and activist groups are very active on social media - and this may just be the most effective way to get and stay involved.


4. Learn more about your hobbies or interests through specialized social media apps

When you think of social media, your mind may go directly to Instagram, Twitter, and Tik Tok. But there are actually a ton of apps that are surrounding hobbies and interests that may not be solely about socials, but have a large social component. Goodreads, for example, is an app on which you can keep track of which books you’ve read, which books you want to read - and how much you liked or recommend them to others. You can follow other people to share book recommendations and reading lists! There are also running apps, where runners can connect with each other for group runs or to share stats, hiking and biking apps, apps for different types of artists, and more. Do a little research for which type of specialized social app may work for you - both to develop or engage with a hobby, and connect with others who have a shared interest!


5. Find and develop friendships or romantic relationships through dating & social apps

You know the apps I’m talking about: Hinge, Bumble, Bumble BFF, Coffee Meets Bagel, Loop, etc. There are many, many dating apps out there whose sole aim is to help you meet others to form romantic connections. More and more apps are also popping up to help you make platonic connections using a similar form or structure to a dating app. While it’s true that these apps are often not used in a way to truly promote IRL connections - many people struggle to move off the app conversations into real life meet ups - if used intentionally, truly can lead to meaningful partnerships, romantic connections, friendships, or anything in between. 


What ways do you use social media to promote real connections in your life?